Love Game

LOVE STINKS!

How does it become so wrong when it just feels so right? Love was nothing but empty promises. Like chasing a pot of gold in the end of the rainbow, like a creeping cancer in your system that’s just waiting to make its move. And when you realized you have it, it’s too late anymore. It’s in its terminal stage already and you’re in the point of no return. Love is chaotic. Love is traitor. Love is demanding and devastating. Love is not just for me. Love just simply hates me. Love is nothing like plague, a pestilence that would cause only catastrophe. Wtf?!

Do I sound bitter with love? Yeah. I guess so.

I FOUND HIM.. yes HIM.

Recently, I was invited by my friend to their church. And his been inviting me for a long time but I was always been hesitant in coming with him. I don’t know why but maybe I wasn’t just ready yet. But suddenly, it was around 4 in the afternoon and I was sleeping at my room. I heard my nephew calling for my Mum because there is someone outside looking for me. I was barely awake and did not care to get up to know who it was. And then moments pass; I realize there is someone in my bedside calling for my name. And when I opened my eyes, it was Kim dressed up. He was inviting me to come with him to their church again. And I was trying to tell him I can’t but a part of me say’s go. Go and experience what he was been telling you. So I get up asked my Mum for permission to come with Kim.

When were there, everyone was so warm and very welcoming. I thought to myself, yeah they were just nice so they can recruit me to their church. But as it all begins. While they were singing their Christian song, I felt something. It was hair rising that I found myself singing along with them. Something in the song struck me. And even the preacher. Or whatever she is, seems like she is talking to me alone. The topic was all about LOVE with your romantic partner and Your LOVE with GOD. I was struck again. Because at those times, I was badly looking for someone to talk to with regards my badly wounded heart. And little by little I came to a realization that I was been missing GOD all along. And he’s been knocking on my doors long enough that I was just neglecting him there.

And when the preacher was having its closing prayer, I found myself crying like a baby. Yes I cried and I don’t know why and how it happens. My tears were very warm that I could feel that it was from my hidden bags of sorrows that I was trying to cover and hide. And in that time, I was able to let all go.

REALIZATION: I know I’m still far from him. But I can certainly say that I felt his presence that time and until now all upon me. His fire energizes me. And now when I was feeling down, I just try to think about him and with just an instance, I feel better. I hope you can experience what I experience as well. GB

it was a blast!

It was a BLAST!! Yeah you heard it right. I had in there almost all the important people in my life. Though some people weren’t there, I understand why they can’t make it. But man, it was a blast. It was one successful party.

I can’t thank you guys far enough. I greatly appreciated. I owe you guys BIG TIME. Can’t name you guys one by one but you know for a fact how much I appreciated your help in making the event possible.

Apir sa GUMS bi. Haha.

bizarre.

Bizarre things happen like “de javu”. It doesn’t give any noticed and it hits me like fate has a personal anger on me. Everything around me seems to be not right at all. Even my own perspective in life is a complete absurd. I know I’m a total asshole for I am one heck of a self centered shit ass bin bag. And I deserved every last pinch of pain of it.

I am irresponsible, arrogant, indolent and conceited.

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Lame game. XD

It’s around 7:11 pm. I’m at our living room completely staring to my stupid PC who has roughly millions of viruses. Good thing there is no hammer around me or I could have smash this stupid thing by now. How was this virus invented anyway? And what do these exceptionally talented nerds came to their abnormal brains which propelled them to make such thing. Duh, bizarre people aren’t they?

Mugel is on my feet now, rubbing its body against my leg. I think my little runt nephew forgets again to feed this cat. O well, I don’t care. Besides, I really want to get rid of this cat anyway. Last night while on my way to the bathroom to take a pee, I accidentally step on one of Mugel’s “landmines”. And damn! Luckily mugel wasn’t around, because if only that stupid cat was on the vicinity, I would have chopped his head off. Can I be sued for killing a cat? Is there any law that inhibits people here in the Philippines from killing cats brutally? Well if there is such thing, then how about those cats used for dissection in medical affiliated courses? Like in my anatomy class way back. Are we reliable for any criminal case? Maybe they should go hunt our Anatomy teacher instead. And I don’t even remember her name (my anatomy teacher). HAHAA! See how good student I was been?

My Mum is calling me to have dinner. But I was pretending not to hear anything. I have on my ears the headphones but the volume is way too low so I can still hear Alice my Mum shouting and really pissed by now. I’m currently listening to Kris Allens version of kanye’s “Heartless”. The song talks about a girl who had dump him. Questioning about how heartless she has been for living him and yet he still lives with her memories. How pathetic right? I can’t relate to this song. Hahaa!

To cut this crappy post short, I had a normal boring day. Like blaa blaa. I woke up on a freezing morning and had a scorching hot afternoon. Nothing special for this day to share to you guys. boring. Duh. Lame.

When Politicians becomes Commercial models…

Haven’t you noticed these past few months? Our television sets were flooded by political commercials. Well maybe because 2010 election is fast approaching. But the thing here is, they spend hundreds of millions just to air there political advertisements in the primetime shows. One candidate is showcasing a kid driving a “Trisikad” along with his younger sister wishing to become an “Atista”. And there’s this other hopeful candidate reminiscing and even showing to the entire Filipinos his old house and how he worked his ass off before becoming of what he is right and now and so on.

But do people really appreciate such crap? Aren’t we all feed up about these things? Like I mean, c’mon! Were not that stupid aren’t we? Well in my own opinion, they were just a bunch of hypocrites giving false hopes and stupid promises to all of us. I’m not singling out any candidate in here, and my not in favor of anyone as well. What I am pointing out is that, we should be more realistic today. We should be keener with these things. Would you entrust your future with these people just because you always see them in the television? Well for me, I would say no. Hell no! People of the Philippines don’t need commercial models?! What this nation needs is someone who will assure us that he will give his pure plain honesty. And someone who will nurture more the safety and welfare of his people before fattening-up his own wallet and bank accounts.

As youth’s of today, we should do our best to protect our votes and make sure will have a clean and honest elections. Be active and participate. Don’t let anyone deprived your right as inhabitant of this country.

* some people missing *

Yes I have many acquaintances but very few to call as my friends. But recently, I kind of notice something. Little by little some people in my life is beginning to keep there distance from me. I don’t know if we had some problems or issues. But as far as I can remember, I really can’t recall such instances. So I went on doing some self reflection. Because I really want to find out what seems to be the problem. And I ran into some things that might be the cause of these things.

• Lack of time – I know and I’m guilty of this. This past few months I’ve been into a lot of which drawn me far from you guys. I was so busy fixing up things and all, where I tend to forget some important people in my life. I was so pre-occupied with love. Darn.

• Change – I know that the only thing constant in this world is change. Maybe our priorities have just change. And even our personalities did. And I don’t know, maybe I just didn’t recognize it but also me, even I had change dramatically where they find it strange and which also drawn them away from me.

But, I miss them, those times when we just talk senseless things and laugh about it like high. Simply all those times when were just together and all are still fresh in my mind. These were those people who I treasure and entrust my life with. These are those people who are before just a text away and boom they’re there in your very face ready to give their time to cheer you up in your darkest moments.

I know it will be impossible to bring back those moments again. For I know were not the same people as we are before. But if only I could just bring it all back, I would gladly do it. I miss you guys and ill see you soon. I hope.